So many of you asked about the dreaded four month sleep regression (that often occurs between 3-5 months of age). The good news is baby is not regressing, but progressing. Baby’s sleep is actually maturing and will be forever changed. It can be even more challenging as babies are starting to roll over around this time, and therefore transitioning from swaddle to sleep sack along with many other changes! It’s a lot and can be very overwhelming, mamas. But don’t worry. I’ve got you. #readon
So what is actually going on? Your newborn who was once cycling through only 2 stages of sleep at night, is now evolving into 4 stages of sleep at night, just like us. Baby will be spending more time in light REM sleep which often causes them to be more sensitive, and thus causes many more wake ups.
The 4 month sleep regression is a big transition for babies as sleep cycles shorten, and babies can’t understand why they are not allowed to “get up” when they wake randomly in the middle of the night! They are unused to their new sleep cycles which have gone from 4-6hours to a now 2-4hours so self settling is very important at this age. Also, object permeance surfaces at this age, where baby starts to understand that her parents and others still exist once they leave their sight which can make sleeping tricky too. There is so much more to say about this major milestone and I’d love to work with you to support your specific needs and customize a plan (email me so we can chat)! In the meantime here are my top tips for mamas and babies going through (or about to go through!) this phase.
Tips For The 4 Month Baby Sleep Regression:
Full Feeds
the 4 month sleep regression coincides with a growth spurt which makes babes extra hungry. Make sure baby is getting full feeds so tummy is full. We want to eliminate all factors including hunger when baby wakes in the night!
Sleep Environment
keep room dark, really really dark. Even a hint of light can disrupt baby sleep and inhibit him or her from falling back to sleep when waking from a sleep cycle
Routine
does baby have a bedtime routine? If not, try to start implementing little rituals before nap and bed. They can be as simple as bath, massage, feed, sing songs, down. Repeating these steps over and over each day/night will start to serve as pleasant sleep associations and cues to baby that it’s time to sleep.
Put Baby Down Awake
this can be hard, but the earlier you work on this, the better and quicker results you will see! If you aren’t already, try to put baby down awake every now and then. Start to practice.
Because imagine Baby A.
Baby A is put down using feed to sleep, rock to sleep, or another technique and sleeping fine. He hits the 4 month sleep regression, wakes up frequently in the middle of the night, and guess what? What does he expect? He wants to be fed, rocked, or whatever he is used to to put back to sleep. Which means mom (or dad) must intervene. Which means they must wake up too. Often.
Now Imagine Baby B.
Baby B is fed, rocked, but put down in crib awake to fall asleep on her own. Baby B hits the 4 month regression, wakes frequently during the night but guess what? Baby B is not upset nor anxious looking for Mom. Baby B knows how to put herself back to sleep. Baby B falls back to sleep, which means mom (and dad) are not woken up. Doesn’t that sound nice?:)
These are of course hypothetical scenarios and even when your baby does go to sleep independently, it doesn’t meant it will always be perfect. This is just one extra tool to keep in mind to set you and babe up for success.
And listen mamas, I am guilty of feeding to sleep and all the things! I have done this with my kids! It’s normal. It’s natural. It’s comforting. So I can’t reiterate enough how hard this step can be. But the sooner baby learns to go to sleep independently, the sooner he and you will get restorative sleep.
Move Bedtime Back
Baby will have shorter naps throughout the day during this regression, so when he does, make sure to pull bedtime back. We don’t want baby put to bed overtired as this will further encourage wake-ups! Once we move through this regression and get back into the swing of things, we can adjust bedtime to suit your family’s needs again!
Allow Practice
Baby is learning to roll at this age amongst other developmental milestones! Give baby plenty of time during wake periods to practice on the floor so she isn’t tempted to practice in the middle of the night or during nap.
Consistency
If you are devoted to working through this regression, or preparing for it (which is smart!), remember to be consistent with what you practice! If you are putting baby down awake already (bravo!), keep doing it! If you are starting to teach baby to fall asleep independently, give him chances over and over again. Keep up the work, it will pay off!
Teamwork
Call in reinforcements – your husband, partner, mother, MIL. You may be tired and need a little extra support during the day. If any of them are willing to take shifts during the night, even better. And as always, reach out.
I don’t know of any baby who has skipped this 4 month sleep regression, but I do know many babies who endured this regression more smoothly than others because they established healthy sleep habits early on. And that’s what I love to support you all on. Healthy, attainable (and realistic) habits, that also allow cuddles in between. These are just a few general tips, but there is so much more to say about this milestone! And every baby is so different!
I’d love to connect with you more on this subject and customize a plan for you and your baby if you need the support. Click below or feel free to DM me on the gram.
Wishing you lots of rest.
